life, oh, life…

While I was supposed to do my assignment.

Have you ever had something that you cannot tell to anyone, even your best friends? Something that may not necessarily be your dark hidden secret, but if it is shared, you might either hurt someone or even yourself, or ruin a reputation – or something along the line…

And I wonder what should have been done when things like that happen.

There’s something that I can’t tell to anyone, even my closest friends. Things that one day will probably break me down, the more I try to suppress…

In this life, there has to be someone who can give you either joy or pain, whose company is expected, though may hurt when you’re with…

“I know you’re not mine, but just give me a little bit more time to be with you”

“Within you’ll remain and always will”

I just want to have that feeling… Where will the future take us?

もう二度と今は戻らない
追い越す過去
あざ笑うような未来みつめたまま

I can’t go back to this moment again
The past is gone
I stare at the future, that seems to be sneering at me – 自由への招待 - L’arc~en~Ciel

Goodbye is not rare; we even say it all the time
But this one is not common:
I’m about to be segregated from a very gentle guy
I should not say that I’m losing a friend
But I can’t guarantee that we will meet again

Some times I thought that writing could express my feelings
But there are times that words are not enough
And what shall I do when words cannot reveal my feelings?
And at times like this, why all I can do is crying?

– of saying farewell to Kit Kat November 27, 2008

You and I will meet again, When we’re least expecting it, One day in some far off place, I will recognize your face, I won’t say goodbye my friend, For you and I will meet again” Tom Petty.

Have you ever felt rejected and disappointed by someone, whether s/he meant it or not? You thought you’ve reached the rock bottom of your life and you just won’t listen to what others said. You only considered that person’s opinion and action alone, especially on that moment per se. You felt rejected and unworthy and ready to hate and despise that person.

But then you braced up and looked back on what s/he has done to you, and you were lifted up again. Pretty ironic that the fact is, the same person that brought you down is the very person that lifted you up. That’s what happened to me, listening to this person’s songs taught me to be strong and I was encouraged. Ironic, ironic, ironic.

The wonderful thing about this experience is when I remember my God. At times, I felt alone and ignored and I felt unworthy too. I felt that I was let down, my prayers weren’t answered. But guess what, it is God who holds us through out our lives, He is the one that keeps us save, the one that carries us in His hands and He has done even much more. All those trials and tribulations that we think are unbearable, are actually the ways for God to show us how much He loves us, and He wants us to always come back to Him.

You hold my every moment, You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire, and heal all my disease

I trust in You, I trust in You

I believe You’re my healer, I believe You are all I need
I believe You’re my portion, I believe You’re more than enough for me
Jesus, You’re all I need (My Healer)

Nothing is impossible for You
Nothing is impossible…
You hold my world in Your hands

—-
Everyone might be enraged with the recent news that yet again, affects people in general in many ways.

The next step that should be taken is to take it as negative or positive impact? Personally, I think this song relates to me in quite a number of ways, and I believe to other believers as well. I needed spiritual healing, and this song somehow helped me through it.

But the news….??

But then again, why am I listening to the song instead of cursing it? Many people said that Mike should be crucified, well guess, what? Let he among us without sin be the first to condemn. So, I say let him go. After all, can we condemn if we-ourself are sinful?

read this:
http://thebrewster.wordpress.com/2008/08/21/i-believe-your-my-healer/